Hey guys? A lovely evening to you all and I believe you are all doing well? Shout out to you Efua? I have gotten all your warnings from my cousin Maame? I would post faster??. Incomparable episode seven…enjoy?
Kwaku and I didn’t talk again for another month and that was the last straw for me. I accepted it and focused on myself, my alone time gave me some time to think about my life and re-strategize.
I started applying for internship jobs to learn a lot more about filmmaking. I applied for a couple of jobs in the states and I got a callback. I went for an interview and I got in. It was an opportunity I didn’t see coming. I got the chance to meet and interact with some giants in the movie industry and I was really humbled. I started loving myself more and being intentional with myself. I had never grasped the concept of self-care, anytime I tried to go on a self-care journey I overthink the whole process and before I know it I was back to doubting myself and my old habits. Living in the states was a different chapter for me and I wanted to do things a little differently.
I started eating healthy and joined a gym that was in my apartment building. The first few weeks when I started I had no idea what I was doing at all but I didn’t give up. I was giving myself all the love, care, and attention I thought I needed from a man.
When I completely understood that I had to love and appreciate myself more I realized that I had finally healed.
I started to understand Kwaku and all that he wanted me to do. I can’t love someone if I don’t love myself.
I thought I was healed and got upset when he said that I wasn’t.
Indeed I wasn’t healed and I needed this time alone to re-discover myself. I felt like a whole new person from the way I walked, talked, and how I carried myself. I was confident and peaceful.
I wanted so badly to call Kwaku and let him know that he was right I did need time to figure myself out but we have been over for over a year now and there was no point.
Julia told me he eventually decided to be with Brenda the girl she thought he was only friends with. I was hurt and really mad at him because he made me believe that I was the one he wanted and loved.
The fight that led to our break up was about how he loved only me and I shouldn’t feel insecure about other women yet after our break up he is the one already in a new relationship.
Julia knew she didn’t have to tell me but she also didn’t want me holding on to Kwaku. I was disappointed and sad for weeks but I picked myself up.
I wasn’t the same weak Nana Afia anymore, I completely and utterly loved Kwaku but I loved myself more and I knew God always had a plan for me.
Julia’s relationship with Alex didn’t go well they were very different people.
Julia was sad, he was all she spoke about anytime we catch up on the phone.
One night instead of talking about our fears I suggested we pray for each other I said a prayer for her and she said a prayer for me. I think our friendship grew stronger that night after we prayed for each other but we never actually admitted it.
I started going out to eat alone in restaurants and interacting a lot with people on various topics picking their brains and they picked mine. It helped build my confidence.
I was off work one weekend and decided to work on a book I had decided to publish.
I titled it Restored, it was my first ever book and after a lot of contemplations, I decided to go for it. I was hopeful it was going to sell on the market because it was my story and I knew there were a lot of women and some men who would relate when they read it.
There was this coffee shop that served the best waffles and chicken, it had a calm environment and it was the place I always went to anytime I wanted to relax, write, read and eat some waffles.
I was eating and focused on my laptop one morning, I had one of my Airpods in my ear listening to Akwaboah’s music.
Ever since I moved to the states, I had come to love his music so much and I don’t know why I didn’t appreciate his music at first. He is an amazing songwriter.
I was completely zoned out writing when someone walked up to my table.
I wasn’t expecting anyone to talk to me that morning, the coffee shop was a place I knew well, and not once had anyone approached me all the times that I had been there.
The owner who was now a friend told me it was because I never smile. But I knew I smiled it wasn’t a lot but I wasn’t an unapproachable person.
I raised my head off my laptop to wrap my braids in a bun and I was startled to see someone standing by my table. My eyes widened and I mistakenly broke my coffee cup.
“ Oh no I am sorry,” he said
He hadn’t noticed I had my AirPod in my ear.
“ You were listening to music?” he asked
I was confused. The waiter quickly came to clean up the mess I had caused. The man offered to help but the waiter insisted that it was fine.
He kept apologizing to me and the waiter. I smiled at him and he smiled back. He looked really embarrassed. He asked if he could sit across from me and I nodded. We waited for the waiter to finish cleaning before we started to talk.
“ I am so sorry”
“ You said that already and I said that it’s fine so you can stop apologizing now. It’s all my fault for not noticing you”
“ What were you up to anyway?” he asked
“ So I am a writer and I was working on my book”
“ Oh? Is it a novel?” he asked
“ Something like that but it’s my life story”
He looked impressed.
“ I would love to read it sometime”
I smiled shyly
“ When it’s ready you’d be the first to know,” I said and we smiled at each other.
We stared at each other in silence and it got awkward
“ Umm.. my name is Keith,” he said to break the silence
“ I am Nana Afia”
He couldn’t pronounce it properly so I taught him how to.
“ I am from Ghana originally but I work here now” I added
“ Oh, Ghana. Lovely place” he said
“Have you ever been?” I asked
“ Yes once. I joined my big sister for the year of the return in 2019”
“ Oh, that’s really nice. I am glad you enjoyed your stay” I said.
I closed my laptop and we ended up talking for a while. The owner of the place noticed Keith sitting with me and sent me a text. “He is handsome” it read and she added a lot of heart emojis.
I giggled and looked in her direction, she did a happy dance when she noticed me looking at her. I smiled and focused my attention back on Keith.
We exchanged numbers before we left the coffee shop and we started building a nice friendship.
He wasn’t Kwaku but he had his own way of making me happy. We shared an unplanned kiss in his car one evening when we went on a date just as friends, I was hoping to get a strong connection with him something similar to what I felt and still feel for Kwaku but there was nothing.
I knew he liked me and wanted to be more than just my friend but I couldn’t see him as more than just a friend.
Keith didn’t believe in God even though he knew He existed. I wanted someone I could pray with, talk about God excitedly with, and someone who would stand in the gap in prayer for me when I wasn’t strong enough to pray and I knew better now than just settle for any man.
I wanted Kwaku as much I denied it, there weren’t many men like him and it sometimes hurts how badly I handled our relationship.
The family moved to Ghana for Nana Yaw and Adjoa’s wedding a couple of months later.
I didn’t join my family in Ghana, I came the morning of the white wedding. I missed the traditional wedding because I couldn’t get a lot of days off from work.
Keith wanted to join me but I wasn’t ready to answer the many questions my family would ask when they saw Keith with me. We were just friends, we needn’t have to travel together it would give my family a wrong impression.
One of my favorite cousins Becca came to get me from the airport and we hurried home to get ready for the wedding. Everyone was so busy when we got to the house so I quickly went to freshen up, fixed my makeup, and got dressed.
I made my way to the church and sat at the back because I was really late. I saw someone that looked a lot like Kwaku from behind but I wasn’t sure that it was him.
A lady that sat next to him whispered something into his ear and he turned to look at the entrance.
It really was him and I was very surprised to see him there. I know we hadn’t spoken in a while but it would have been nice to let me know he was coming to Ghana for my big brother’s wedding.
I was seated close to the entrance but he didn’t see me. He smiled as he watched the door, and I saw Julia walk swiftly by. Kwaku waved at Julia and pointed at another seat next to him that he had saved for his little sister.
Julia, I knew, but I was unsure about the other woman.
I wasn’t sure if I have shot myself in the foot by messing things up with Kwaku when he was all mine.
I kept looking at them the whole time the ceremony was going on.
“ is that Brenda?” I thought
I was jealous; they looked good together.
At the reception, I tried to catch Julia alone but there was never a right moment.
As the sister to the groom, I had to give a sweet speech to my brother and my new sister-in-law.
I wrote a nice speech for them and rehearsed it constantly for days because I wanted to say it without looking at my phone but after seeing Kwaku I had become very nervous. The MC mentioned my name and everyone started to clap, I smiled and walked to the front. I looked at Kwaku first and I got a lot more nervous but I didn’t let it weigh me down. I turned to face Nana Yaw and Adjoa and smiled. They looked so beautiful together.
I gave my speech, everyone loved it and I was glad I was able to pull it off. When I sat back down, I saw Julia coming over to my table. She was very excited to see me.
“ Nana Afia..!!” she said
“ When did you arrive? I miss you” she said and hugged me
I smiled and hugged her back.
She quickly took a chair and sat next to me.
“ I didn’t know you had plans of coming for Nana Yaw and Adjoa’s wedding. The last time we spoke you didn’t mention it” I said
“ We hadn’t decided yet”
“ By we do you mean you and Kwaku?”
“ Yeah. He didn’t want to come because of you for obvious reasons. But I convinced him. We decided only a week ago”
“ I see. Umm.. who is the lady that he is with?”
“ Oh? Awuraba? That’s Kwaku’s wife. They had a very small private wedding. A couple of months ago” Julia said and poured herself a drink.
My heart skipped a beat and my eyes widened. I looked at Julia as she sipped on her glass
“ What did you just say?” I asked
Julia broke out laughing hysterically almost choking on her drink.
“ You should see the look on your face. You just died right now, I can tell”
“ I hate you so much,” I said
Julia kept laughing
“ Well, go on tell me who is she?” I asked
“ That’s our step-sister.”
“ Stepsister? How come I never knew this?”
“ Yeah. Dad used to be married but that lady died giving birth to Awuraba. He met mummy a year later and they got married and had Kwaku. But Awuraba’s mother’s people gave daddy a very hard time, so he basically couldn’t get access to her for years and years but Daddy tried his best to be there for her as much as he could”
“ Oh… I see”
“ Yeah. She hasn’t been around for a while. She is based in New Zealand now with her husband but Kwaku told her we would be coming to Ghana and since she hasn’t been here in a long time she decided to join us. She and Kwaku are very close I am guessing it is because they are aged just a year apart ”
“ So how is Kwaku doing?” I asked.
Julia turned and looked in his direction
“ Well, he is okay. I think. He misses you. I know that for sure but all in all he has been okay. How about you?”
“ I have been very busy with work. Trying to figure a lot of things out”
“ Have you figured out what you feel for Kwaku now?”
“ How do you mean?”
“ I mean are you ready to be with him for real?”
“ You know I love Kwaku very much. Come on, you know everything that has happened. I reached out but it’s him that doesn’t want to be with me anymore for some reason”
“ You really did hurt him though,” Julia said
Kwaku and Awuraba came over to my table to say hello. Seeing him up close made me miss him a lot. I just wanted to jump into his arms and kiss him.
“ You are very beautiful Nana” Awuraba blurted out.
“ Thank you. You are very beautiful too Awuraba” I said
Kwaku looked at me and smiled.
“ so we have to leave now. I wanted to come and say hello. Your speech was nice. Well done” he said
“ Thanks a lot, Kwaku,” I said
“ Okay.. how long are you going to be here for?” Julia asked
“ Just a week” I answered
“ Okay I would call you,” Julia said and followed Kwaku out.
I thought about Kwaku all night, Keith called to ask about the wedding I was speaking to Keith but I wish it was Kwaku.
I hung out with Julia and Awuraba the next day.
Julia told Awuraba everything about Kwaku and me and she wanted more gist so she planned a lunch date.
“ I can work my magic on him you know, and bring you two back together asap,” Awuraba said
“ I thought Kwaku was in a relationship with Brenda?” I asked
“ They have broken up,” Julia said
“ What? And you didn’t think to let me know?” I said
“ He hasn’t told me personally but I eavesdropped his conversation with mummy before we came to Ghana and he said something along the lines of that. He didn’t tell Brenda about this trip so I am guessing they have really broken up but I am not very sure”
“ Well, it’s too late anyway. It doesn’t matter. I think I got my chance with him and I ruined it. Maybe we aren’t meant to be after all”
“ He loves you Nana Afia. He really, really does. Please don’t give up on him”
“ He is the one that has given up on me Julia. Can’t you see? The longest conversation we have had in the last year was yesterday when he came to talk to me at the reception. He doesn’t want me anymore. And I get it, I hurt him pretty badly” I said
My phone rang I knew it was Keith he hasn’t stopped calling since I came to Ghana.
I checked my phone and when I saw the letter K, I was expecting to read the name Keith but it was Kwaku.
I checked again to be sure.
“ Kwaku is calling me,” I said surprisingly.
“ What?” Julia asked
I showed her my phone
“ Well answer it then,” Awuraba said excitedly
I quickly did before the call ended
“ Hello?” I said
“ Hey. How are you?”
“ I am okay. How are you?”
“ I am fine. Are you home?”
“ Not at the moment”
“ I want to see you. Can I see you? Please?”
“ Umm.. where are you now?” I asked
“ I am home”
“ Is it the same place we were the last time we came to Ghana ?”
“ No, a different place. I would send you my location now”
“Okay sure. See you soon” I said
“ Okay. Thanks” he said and ended the call
He sent his location to me right after the call ended.
“ He wants to see me,” I said and smiled
I was excited I couldn’t believe what was happening.
“ Okay, run along then. Julia and I would hang around here to give you two time to talk” Awuraba said
“Good luck Nana Afia!” Julia said excitedly.
I hesitated before I rang the bell when I got to his place.
“ Coming!” I heard him call out
I was very nervous. My heart skipped a beat when I heard him walking towards the door.
“ Hi,” he said and smiled when he opened the door.
He showed me in and I sat on the couch. The house was very beautiful.
“ Are you living in here alone?” I asked
“ Oh no. I am here with Julia and Awuraba” he said
“ What would you like to drink?” he asked
“ Just water is fine,” I said
He brought me a bottle of water and sat next to me. I missed his perfume so much.
“ Thanks for passing by Nana,” he said
“ I was a little shocked to see your call though,” I said
“ I know,” he said and smiled
“ I heard you are now living in the states?” he added
“ Yes. I work there now. It’s been quite an exciting experience”
“ I am very happy for you”
“ Thanks, Kwaku”
There was an awkward silence
“ So, why did you want to see me?” I asked
He just stared at me and smiled
“ I missed you Nana Afia. Seeing you yesterday at the wedding, made me miss you, miss us and what we used to be. I really don’t know where your head is at now or if you are with someone new but I just wanted you to know my feelings for you haven’t changed”
I looked at him and he continued speaking
“ I am so sorry. I know I have been the biggest jerk for over a year but all those days without you were very hard for me. I can’t count the number of times I picked up my phone to text or call you but changed my mind because I didn’t want to confuse you”
“ Confuse me? How?”
“ I wanted you to be sure you wanted to be with me all by yourself”
“ But Kwaku, I reached out to you a lot of times but you ignored me”
“ That’s because I thought by then you still weren’t sure about me and you only wanted to meet because you thought you have hurt my feelings and wanted me to feel better. I didn’t need that at that time, what I needed was for you to be sure about me and work on yourself but you stopped reaching out after a while”
“ Because I thought you were done with me and I didn’t want to bother you. It hurt a lot anytime you ignored my messages Kwaku and I didn’t want to be ignored anymore. When I stopped texting you, you also never reached out.”
“ Do you still love me?“ he asked
I was surprised by his question when I knew he was in a relationship with someone new.
“ I know you are with another woman Kwaku. Brenda? Julia told me” I said
Kwaku looked at me and sighed
“ I was in a bad place and wanted to get over you. I thought I would try to get to know her because she was always there. I needed the distraction. I tried getting to know her but she isn’t you Nana ”
“ Were you intimate with her?” I asked
“ By intimate do you mean to ask if I had sex with her”
“ Yes,” I said
“ I didn’t have sex with her. I didn’t lie to you when I told you I am celibate Nana Afia. I can see you still don’t trust me”
“ It’s not about me not trusting you Kwaku”
“ Then what is it about? I have been nothing but honest and open to you but you never believe me. Jumping the gun and having sex with Kimberly cost her life and our unborn baby. Do you know how heavy carrying a burden like that is? Do you how many times I constantly asked God to forgive me? It was a very difficult time for me so I chose to be celibate so I do not put another woman through that again. I thought you understood me. You have no idea how many times I had fought myself anytime I was close to you. You are so beautiful and of course, I wanted you but it never happened because I am a man of my word Nana as much as you don’t want to believe it. I am. If I was able to stay celibate with you whom I love so much and definitely find very attractive why could you possibly think I would do something with Brenda whom I don’t love? Asking me if I had sex with her just shows you never believed me”
I looked at him and got a little embarrassed
“ After a year I thought you might have gotten some time to understand me but I can clearly see that nothing has changed,” he said
I got upset by what he said, I was still angry with him for dating someone new a short while after our break up.
“ True Kwaku. You are right! I don’t believe you, because you told me you loved me and it was only me but you were quick to distract yourself with some girl when you clearly knew I wanted us to make it work. How can you be in love with me yet want to hang out with other girls? How does that add up?!” I said almost shouting.
He stayed quiet and I continued to talk
“ You said we could take it slow and go at any pace I wanted when you asked me to be your girlfriend so why were you quick to leave when I made a mistake? Of course, I wasn’t fully healed but you knew that before we started our relationship. But you left and broke my heart. Do you know how many times I cried myself to sleep?”
“ I was suffering too Nana” he interrupted
“ Clearly you were not! How can you be suffering when you let Brenda ease your pain? So excuse me, if I want to know if you went all the way with this woman whom you thought was a perfect distraction” I said angrily and started to tear up. I was very upset my hands were shaking.
I was tired of being hurt by people I love. I didn’t want Kwaku to see me crying so I picked up my purse to leave but he asked me to stay
“ Please don’t go, Nana. You are clearly very upset. I don’t you to leave here this upset please” he said and held my arm
I pulled my arm away from him and sat back down. He looked at me but I looked away.
“ I am sorry. I am so sorry my actions caused you this much pain. I didn’t get with Brenda to hurt you. At the time I thought I was doing something that would help take my hurts away. Nothing happened with her, we only kissed a couple of times that’s all”
I know it was only a kiss and to be fair I had kissed Keith too but it still hurt very much to know Kwaku had kissed Brenda more than once.
“ I kissed someone else too,” I said with a stern look on my face.
He looked hurt, his face changed
“Who?” he asked
“ Does it matter? You don’t know him”
“ Okay..” he said and stopped speaking
He was really hurt and clearly jealous and upset.
He picked up my empty water bottle and walked to the kitchen to dispose of it but he stayed longer in the kitchen.
I went to check on him, I was shocked at how very elegant the kitchen looked.
I found him leaning against the sink and looking outside the window.
“ So you get to kiss some girl but get upset when you find out I kissed someone too?”
“ Quit talking about it, I heard you the first time Nana. I now understand why you stopped reaching out to me you were busy kissing people”
“ Stop being petty Kwaku. I only met the guy a couple of months ago”
He turned to look at me
“ Couple of months ago? So it’s a fresh relationship?”
“ He is just my friend”
“ Friend? Ooh, so you are kissing just friends now? I see” he said and stormed out of the kitchen
Thank you for reading ? Catch you on the next episode soon?. Love Always…Goodnight xx