I hope the angels in heaven know what they have and I hope you are cracking them up too. I just can’t believe you are gone darling. I remember how I looked forward to meeting you when I found out we were paired together. I was very nervous to meet you even though we have been texting way before we met in person.

The first time I saw you, I was intrigued by your voice and the way you pronounced certain words. I am such a sucker for eloquence. I have been playing your voice messages over and over just to hear your voice. It was a pleasure knowing you sweetie. I don’t think I would ever be able to forget you and I don’t want to. 

I am glad you chose to share your very last moments with me, even though I would never know what that last text message from you meant. 

God, did I want more days for you than the ones you got. You were hilarious, very kind. You always took time to talk to me every day even though you were stuck in hospital fighting for your life because you knew I would go crazy if I didn’t hear from you.  

I am eternally grateful to God for bringing you my way. Your smile and your laughter. You were the only one that thought I am a great dancer and I wonder what dance move did it for you. Now, who would hype me up? 

I am going to miss you. When Keanu Reeves said when someone dies, those who love them would miss them, he was very right. 

I am going to miss you recommending nice documentaries to me on Netflix, I am going to miss teasing you whenever Chelsea loses a match. I am going to miss your amazing taste in music. I am going to miss the funny faces you make any time we video call. I am going to miss our Random Question sessions every night.  It was nice watching movies with you regardless of our distance, it always felt like we were in the same room. 

I appreciate you opening up to me, I know it wasn’t easy but thank you for trusting me with everything. Thank you for showing me your world. I wish you would have read the last two episodes of Fire And Ice. The character Dean was inspired by you and yes he got the girl. 

I want to be angry but what’s the point in wanting you to wake up when it would cause you more pain being alive? 

Probably it’s because I want a better goodbye, Kevin, probably I want answers to why it had to be you and why so soon? When I close my eyes I see your smile, the smile not a lot of people get to see because you pretend to be a hard guy when you truly are a mushy big baby. We forget how cruel death can be. I really thought we had more time. 

Even though I want to see you and talk to you every day, I would console myself with the fact that you aren’t in pain anymore.

This hurts Kevin! This hurts so much. Why? Why, did you have to go? You promised you would stay. You broke your promise. 

This morning when I was on my way to the office, I passed by a golf course and it made me miss you. I was looking forward to our golf lessons together. 

Now, I guess I would have to explore South Africa by myself someday. I promise to check out Port Elizabeth and take a lot of photos. 

Last night, I placed Battle by David Guetta ft Faouzia on repeat and listened attentively to the lyrics. It makes sense now why that song was your favorite. Every day was a battle to you and I saw you fight every single day. You were so strong. I always prayed for you, asking God to help you every step of the way. I guess He has reasons why He took you to be with Him. As I said, I do not want to be angry and question God. 

I just remembered during the time you were hospitalized, one day we hadn’t spoken a lot because I was busy. You called to check up on me, and when we spoke I could hear the pain in your voice. When the call ended, I was glad you took time out to call because you had told me time without a number how much you disliked talking on the phone but would rather text. 

So to want to talk to me on the phone even when you were in constant pain only showed how really amazing you were. I am so sorry you had to go through all that pain Kevin but it’s all over now. 

You were so amazing and I hope I told you enough.

Goodnight Darling, until we meet again. 

I sure do hope all this is just a dream that I would soon wake up from. Rest in Perfect Peace DJ K3V. I love you ? 

With Love, From Your Tiny Dancer.